With Thanksgiving a few days away, it’s a necessary time to reflect on the positive aspects of your romantic relationship. It is usual for the human mind to focus on the negative. It is normal to get bored. It is normal for the spark to die down. A couple can start to take their partner for granted. It can be helpful to think back to when you first met. What did you think of your partner? What attracted you to them? If you are in a committed relationship, what made you want to commit to them among everyone else? If you are a married couple, what caused you to want to marry your spouse among all others? Not only is feeling gratitude important but expressing gratitude and communicating appreciation is too.
If you have been in a relationship for a long time, what struggles have you survived together? What have you learned about your partner, and what have they learned about you? Maybe you are experiencing the joy of raising kids together or visiting with grandchildren. Even if you argue more than you once did, perhaps that is a sign that you have grown more comfortable expressing yourselves.
Some parts of your relationship may be better than ever. Perhaps you are retired and now able to travel more as a couple. Maybe you have done an excellent job of saving and now have more financial freedom. You may have been able to move into your dream home.
For younger couples or engaged couples, you may have a lifetime to look forward to. You may still be in the honeymoon stage, where your partner’s annoying habits are still endearing (that will change). Gratitude can improve sex lives.
If you and your partner are not doing well, perhaps couples counseling would be a good step. Almost any situation can be helped if both partners are willing to put in the work. Maybe you are divorced and can still recall fond past memories or deal with your partner amicably.
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