Pre-marriage Counseling

Happy married couple Pre-marriage counseling Pre marriage

Before marriage, a couple often experiences their peak happiness. The infatuation phase has typically not worn off at this point. So, why would such a couple require counseling? Pre-marriage or engagement counseling typically serves as a preventive measure, helping to maintain the strength of the relationship in the years ahead. Engaged couples should also recognize that relationships go through phases, each with its pros and cons. Unfortunately, many couples mistakenly believe in a fairy-tale ending without acknowledging the effort required.

Some goals of pre-marriage, engagement counseling, or newlywed counseling:

Common Pre Marriage Counseling Goals

While particular goals are up to you, some common goals include those below.

 

    • Developing and discussing shared life goals

    • Understanding negative communication patterns and what patterns you have already developed

    • Learning proven communication strategies

    • Understanding if there are any unmet needs related to each person’s family of origin

    • Discussing potential expected roles related to aspects like gender, age, or career

    • Appreciating your strengths and weaknesses

    • Understanding how cultural differences may impact your marriage

    • Coming to a clear understanding of what would constitute being unfaithful (not as black and white as it used to be)

    • Openly discussing fears

    • Discussing if or how religion or spirituality will factor into your marriage

    • Talking through plans or thoughts about having kids

    • Communicating and understanding expectations for managing budgets and finances

    • Expectations for how you will spend your time once married (how much with individual friends, mutual friends, together, with family, etc.)

    • Where you plan to live in the short and long term

    • Talking through concerns about having a wedding

    • How will your career goals impact your relationship, and if you have kids, how will they be raised?

    • Many more…

Also, check out some of the benefits of secular pre-marriage counseling and Christian pre-marriage counseling.

It is Normal to Have Questions or Doubts About Marriage

Getting married is a significant step, and its magnitude varies based on the duration of your relationship and life circumstances. For some, especially those marrying for the first time at a young age, it’s a novel experience. Others may have divorced and face concerns related to blended families. The transition from living independently to cohabitation is another aspect, with some adapting to it and others encountering it for the first time.

It’s not uncommon for couples to harbor last-minute doubts about committing their lives to someone else. Questioning a seemingly great relationship just before a wedding is normal. It’s natural to have concerns about what married life entails and what challenges typical couples undergo. These concerns can be openly discussed in a safe pre-marriage counseling environment, addressing all the issues you feel comfortable sharing.

Questions for Pre-Marriage Counseling

Our church offers this service; why shouldn’t we go there?

That may be the best option for you. Many religious organizations offer or even require some form of counseling through their organization. You may decide this is affordable (or free) and more than sufficient. On the other hand, you may choose to talk more elsewhere about more secular topics. For example, you may not be comfortable talking about your sex life with the clergy. Your religious counseling may need to be supplemented by a licensed counselor to help you work through associated anxiety. Many religious organizations say they offer “pre-marriage counseling”, and while what they offer may be valuable, it’s not legal to call it counseling unless they are licensed counselors. Extending your counseling outside a religious organization may also appeal to you to get another perspective.

We aren’t religious; do you offer purely secular counseling?

Absolutely. If you aren’t religious or prefer to leave religion out of counseling, that is perfectly fine. We have curriculum from Prepare and Enrich that can either be Christian-based or secular.

What if we don’t want to talk about personal topics like our sex life?

No one has to discuss anything they aren’t comfortable sharing. Hopefully, we will develop a healthy therapeutic relationship where no topic related to your marriage feels uncomfortable or off-limits.

Will a male pre marriage counselor take the side of the man?

We try to never take sides, except for the side of the relationship. That said, many men have said they prefer to work with a male premarital counselor.

Do you offer premarital counseling near me?

The office is located right off I-270, near Tuttle Mall in Dublin, Ohio. It is a short drive from Hilliard, Upper Arlington, Worthington, Westerville, New Albany, Powell, or Columbus, Ohio. Telehealth is available for anyone who is in Ohio during the videoconference.

Can we bring up religious issues in counseling?

Yes. You will not be advised what you should do from a religious perspective, but you can talk about how your beliefs may impact your marriage.

What if we decide we aren’t ready for marriage yet?

That doesn’t happen often, but it is a possibility. Wouldn’t you rather know ahead of time that you perhaps need more time to think things through or want to achieve specific goals first? But, of course, this decision is ultimately up to you, and you won’t be pushed either way. However, the question could come up in pre-marriage counseling for you to discuss with your partner.

I have many premarital counseling questions, and probably more than can be answered here.

Feel free to contact us. Most questions about the process can be answered via phone, or at a pre-marriage counseling blog.

Where can I find pre marriage counseling near me?

Thanks to telehealth (videoconference, AKA Zoom), premarital counseling is available here to anyone residing in Ohio during the time of the appointment. The office is also located in Columbus, Ohio (technically Dublin, OH) to make in-person visits available. The office is near Dublin OH, Marysville, Plain City, Upper Arlington, Hilliard, Westerville, New Albany, and Worthington.

Do you offer Christian pre-marriage counseling?

Yes, if that is what you desire. This can vary based on the beliefs of clients. You may just want to talk briefly about how your religion will impact your marriage, or you may want a much more involved focus on Christianity and marriage. Regardless of your personal beliefs, there is no judgment here. You have the opportunity to openly discuss how you want your marriage to align with and reflect those beliefs.

Can we get online pre-marriage counseling?

Yes, you can get online premarital therapy in Columbus Ohio, or anywhere in Ohio provided that you are in the state for the appointment. Online therapy is convenient for many couples.

What if we have additional premarriage counseling questions?

You can call 614.327.1600 or contact us. You can also view the site’s main frequently asked questions page for more general questions.

You Can Grow In Your Relationship

Pre marriage couples therapy is appropriate for couples who want preventative discussion or need help navigating some concerns. It is normal to have struggles in any relationship, and getting on top of current or potential marriage concerns through couples counseling can be a very positive step.