One reason couples who want to improve their relationship choose not to go to couples counseling is that they are afraid of the time commitment. This is understandable and can be difficult for those with already busy lives. However, the following are 5 reasons to make time anyway.
1. What is more important than your relationship?
When asked, people often say the most important thing is family. Whether you are a dating couple, in a pre-marriage stage, or married for a long time, healthy relationships are crucial to happiness. Finding an hour every week or every other week can help you to improve your relationship. If you say you don’t have that kind of time, that may shed light on the reality that what you say you value does not match what you value or doesn’t match how you spend your time. Videoconference appointments are available for those who want to save drive time or don’t want to worry about finding a babysitter. Videoconferences are great for anyone who wants Ohio couples counseling but live further away from Columbus, Ohio. Those who live near Upper Arlington, Worthington, Hilliard, Olentangy, Powell, Westerville, New Albany, Deleware, and Marysville may want to come in person for counseling. Some clients have brought infants into the office (which is OK with us if it’s OK with you). Starting on a monthly interval isn’t recommended for you to see the best progress, but it can be better than no therapy. Would you take an hour to get your car fixed or your teeth cleaned? Why not take an hour for your relationship?
“Love is everything it’s cracked up to be… It really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don’t risk anything, your risk is even greater.”– Erica Jong
2. Delaying Getting Assistance Isn’t Likely to Make Issues Go Away
Some clients, and men, in particular, would often prefer to sweep issues under the rug hoping that they will either be forgotten or go away. But, unfortunately, your problems are likely to get worse. John Gottman of the Gottman Institute and co-creator of the Gottman Method for Couples Therapy has found that couples typically wait about six years after the sign of severe issues before seeking help.
3. How Much Time Does a Divorce or Separation Take?
For couples talking about divorce or separation, think of how much time that will take from your life (not to mention the emotional toll). Wouldn’t you rather be proactive and try to prevent such problems if that is your goal? If you choose you want divorce or separation, wouldn’t you want to talk about how to make it as painless as possible? Some couples find that their relationship isn’t for them but still find value in learning more about relationships to avoid future pitfalls.
4. There is Value in Occasionally Coming to Therapy by Yourself
While it is generally ideal to have sessions with your partner, coming by yourself can be helpful if your schedules don’t align. Some individuals like a certain amount of time to tell their side of the story without interruption or fighting. “Homework” is minimal and usually just involves practicing the skills you have learned in therapy.
5. An Ounce of Prevention…
The earlier couples seek therapy at the sign of an issue, the faster, cheaper, and more effective it is likely to be. It takes a lot of time to master healthy communication techniques if your communication has been unhealthy for decades. I wish schools taught how to navigate romantic relationships as part of the required curriculum, but most people try to figure it out independently. Learning proven techniques from the Gottman Method and Emotionally Focused Therapy can help make a healthy relationship. Couples who aren’t yet fully committed or want pre-marriage counseling can get great benefits by being proactive.
